I've had that problem as well. My mother used questions as a way to criticize me. She would often ask something like "Why do you think X?" in a tone of voice that suggested "Why the h___ do you think X?" And then she would take it personally, yell at me, and tell me all that was wrong with my view. So for many years I felt defensive and hurt when people asked perfectly reasonable questions. I am doing better now but must remain vigilante!