thanks you all, you each came up with some really good stuff... i like it... sometimes the lesson is about how to learn....... i am a pretty slow learner i spose lol .... ive had two serious psychological episodes in my life.... psychiatry has always been on my shoulder but, i was like some bumbling idiot trying to find professional therapy... i got some alright and the words they spoke all made sense to me.... i had such difficulty applying them... slow learner..... i hope im on the right path now.... you all matter so much to me..... (((((ALL OF PC))))))))))