I keep thinking about his change in attitude when you switched from talking about stuff between the two of you to talking about stuff with your daughter. That seems like such an interesting observation. When I think about "the therapeutic relationship," I think of it as a relationship that is therapeutic, not just the relationship between a therapist and a client. It's different from other relationships for a very good reason. But he seems to think that the relationship between the two of you needs to be just good enough and comfortable enough that you can talk freely about stressors and relationships outside therapy. It's like you're trying to rap and he's trying to conduct a symphony and you're both just getting pissed off at each other.

I keep coming back to this thread because I feel this urge for you to see how his approach is incompatible with the things you seem to want to do right now. Like I want you to borrow my T for a couple of weeks to see what I'm talking about. You're a duck paddling furiously underwater, but it's like you only have one leg so you're going in circles. I don't at all want this to feel like a criticism, just that I wish you could get what you're looking for and I'm not sure you don't know what you don't know. You know?

ETA: I'm not even anti-Dr. T if he's useful. I just feel like the two of you aren't speaking the same language at times.