((((((((jbug)))))))))) So sorry to hear you are in such a tough spot right now. I just wanted to reassure you that you aren't comic relief for anyone sweetie. And most surely not to God. He loves you and knows your sufferings, hears your cries. God would never delight in your pain.

Bad things happen to good people. We may never really understand why, but it does happen. Just as surely as some good things happen for bad people. I won't pretend to have all the answers. I just wanted to let you know in these difficult times, if we draw closer to God, He in turn will draw closer to us.

Peace be with you
recluse1