Yes, I think I can relate to this (except for the part about thinking I was going to be happy forever. I never kidded myself that something such as that might occur.)
In my case, though, I'm now on Clonazepam both for my anxiety and anger issues as well as for a couple of physical issues the medication seems to help with. And the Clonazepam seems to keep me on an even keel, so to speak. So I seem less likely to suffer additional incidents over which, afterwards, I experience any more shame and embarrassment than I already have.
Hope your new med, along with the therapy, gets you back to feeling well again.