Quote:
Originally Posted by ElectricManatee
I haven't done legit DBT, but the T who taught me a bunch of DBT things and is trained in DBT is huuuge on validation. Almost excessively so. She would say that all feelings are valid even if not all feelings are justified. It has really changed how I interact with people and especially with my toddler. It's kind of magical.
Thanks for the podcast link zoiecat. I started listening to it, and it's really good so far.
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I like this line. Would you say it changes both how you act toward them (how you treat them, what you say to them, etc.) and how you react to them?
My parents were (and still are) bad at validating my feelings. I saw things like good grades in school, teachers liking my work, etc. as ways to get validation in other forms. And, of course, sought it from other people, mainly authority figure types, but also friends and romantic partners. Hm...and I guess music in a sense, too--hearing other people sing about what I'm feeling provides a form of validation, I think.
I try to validate my D as much as possible, but I think her autism makes it hard for her to understand what I mean at times, regarding emotions. Or else I'm just not very good at expressing that!