Hmm, good question. I would say yes (to both) because it helps me not take their feelings personally. It's easier to accept that the other person feels the way they do and that there must be a reason for it, even if that's not how I feel. It matters much less to me now whether they are "right" to feel that way. Small children are irrational creatures by nature, so this comes up a lot with my kid where she might be upset about something (or nothing) and I can help her name and understand what she feels without doing anything to try to change the feeling (or the situation) or try to rationalize her feeling away or shame her for having it.

Sometimes I have been upset about something outside therapy that I bring up with this T (Amy, my EMDR T), and she's always very understanding and validating and makes lots of space for me to rage/complain/cry. And then once I've done that and feel understood, we might pick apart whether that feeling is justified or whether I was triggered by something else or whatever. And the validation of the feeling makes me feel safe enough and calm enough then to sometimes decide that no, that person didn't actually do anything wrong and the feeling isn't justified. Kind of like how sometimes the easiest way to change something is to first accept it without trying to change it...