So ever since I was 17 (I’m now 30) I have been through on and off periods of questioning my sexuality. One moment I am convinced that I am just a straight woman who gets girl crushes and then one new piece of information regarding things like bisexuality, asexuality, etc and then I am once again in the cycle of questioning. As a result this has often times given me anxiety when it comes to dating and relationships as I am always afraid that I will never be attracted to the guys I am dating.

I have had crushes on a few boys as a kid, but I have had far more infatuations towards women (usually I don’t really want to have sex or marry them). I rarely have crushes on guys. And this of course makes me anxious.

Currently I am with my boyfriend for 2 years, but the anxiety and fears of not really loving him do interfere with things at times. I am at a certain stage of my life and sometimes I fear that I will someday be in an unfulfilled marriage because I didn’t allow myself to further explore my sexuality.

I told my therapist about this during our last session and she said that if this is a significant part of me that has probably mostly gone unexplored then maybe I should find ways of exploring this without compromising my current relationship.

Do any of you have any tips on how I can explore my sexuality without having to do anything immoral like cheat?