I felt like a mistake since I was a child, when I knew I wasn't supposed to be here. It was so easy to disappear into my private world. The problem now is my inner world isn't private like then, because the voices know everything I'm thinking. But I'm afraid to tell a therapist very much of how it is. Unless they have experienced the difficulties of dealing with two worlds, they can't understand. They use the label Delusional. The only escape I have from the inside world is dissociation, derealization, & depersonalization. I didn't invent these solutions. I think my subconscious (friend?, protector?) gave them to me.