Agreed with both of you.

I used to self-medicate without even realizing it. I am so happy I do not anymore. I did not notice the changes until stopping and really looking back. I thought I was okay but I was not and I certainly was not helping myself.

Self medicating does make things worst. I got myself into more trouble. I might of been able to do things I wanted but they never turned out the way they should of.

I used to be a partier. I think I did that to escape. The only way I actually lasted was by drinking and such... I realize now that I was never really a party-type person. I just wanted to find somewhere to belong and was going about it the wrong way.

It's not good if you don't want to talk to anyone. Talking to a therapist would be best. I know I personally never told any therapist when I did drugs. I never was extremely big on them like some people but I still did them to self medicate and to "fit in". When I used to see help I would never tell them that. Little to my knowledge but due to drinking and doing drugs the after effects and while intoxicated was affecting me and my actions negatively more then positively.

When I went in and told them everything about my past for my first session to find the person best suited to talk to me it felt like a weight lifted.

I've been in the the hospital in the psych ward twice now. If you do self-medicate you may end up back in the mental hospital. I'm not sure if you want that but that may be what ends up happening.

Also for me personality doing self medication and going out partying was my way to avoid the internal battle I had with myself and trying to avoid the reality of it. I thought it would help but if anything doing what I did made it worst.

I wish you luck! I think continuing to talk to people and especially to those who relate may be best.