A heavy sad feeling this morning! My life has gone downward since the moment I understood that I did not have many friends here at the new place. Will a week at the Mediterranean Sea Coast help? What when I come home again? I need to fight, but I have been fighting for years and years and years. Something inside me says that even if it is so, I have to continue this fight. As long as I there is breath in me, I'm obliged to fight. Who says so? God, I think. There is some sort of help in being a believer. I will fight! As this statement comes, the heaviness is not so heavy anymore. May be it's the "living one day at the time" from the 12 steps ...