Beth, I agree your T is wrong in how she does things. If she can't provide consistent care, she should find something else to occupy her. It's good, in my opinion, that you leave her. I would draw her ethics into question.

That being said, I find driving past a T's home to be a violation of boundaries. I think I might know the city where my T lives, and I'm not ever planning to go there, let alone would I drive past his house or drop anything off at his door. I even avoid walking past his office unless I have a session there. However, I acknowledge that my situation may be different. I have issues with malignant fantasies and I have been friends with a stalker in the past (over the internet). I felt very connected to this guy and find this sort of behaviour would but be a little bit of a stretch for me. Me doing that sort thing would worry me (and it would most certainly worry my T). Just saying that to point out that while I do feel correct in saying it is generally wrong to drive past a T's house, my perspective is of course tainted by the specific circumstance of me being me.