Hi, I’ve copied a post off another forum, called Childhood emotional neglect, and it is almost me and what I go through, the author of this post was anonymous . I go around in mind loops of constant scene setting in my mind and its not calming soothing, but it is distracting. It is stressful and gives me great anxiety, but I cant stop.
Here is the post of another poster on another board but feel its close to my issue

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Hey all 👋 I don't think this needs a trigger warning.

I don't know if I've made a post about this ever, even though it's been an issue for a long time. I wondered if anyone else struggles with intense crushes that become obsessive? Like logically, I don't want these men, for the most part I barely know them, if at all. I try to stop, but I am so lonely and I've got so much responsibility, and it's hard to stop thinking about them even when I should. My self control is limited.

I'll hear they're seeing someone, and it doesn't stop anyway. I never make a move, I've gone through this for so long I can act completely normal face to face, and don't stalk them or anything like that. I can function through it. But it's painful. Does anyone else go through this? Does anyone know any mantras or actual good ways to distract myself?

*To tie this to CEN, this started in my relationship with my ex husband, who I've since realized was severely neglectful, just like in my childhood.

I didn't get these crushes when I was with my last ex, maybe because he responded to me more.

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Similar in some ways, and with variants.
I could elaborate on another thread.
This maladaptive daydreaming is not comforting as some may experience, it is me trying to find ways and sorting through emotions and cravings of connection.
Thanks for reading