Beth, I'm really sorry you're dealing with this. Your T should have been in touch more regularly, whether sending something herself or having her office do so, giving a better sense of her time line and also offering up other T's for her clients in the meantime.

She also handled the gifts poorly--maybe she thought she was communicating that you shouldn't send more with her "You shouldn't have, but thanks." However, that's a common thing for people to say when getting an unexpected gift--"Thanks, you shouldn't have!" So I imagine you took it in that sense (and maybe it's also how she meant it). Plus, she said she'd hang it in the garden, which suggests she appreciated it. If she really didn't feel appropriate accepting the gift (or was bothered that you took it to her house), she should have conveyed that to you then.

Where she also made a big error in communication was not saying anything following the couple gifts after that. And waiting until it really built up, then exploding on you. I also don't understand how receiving the gifts could cause her to lose her license? If it was really an issue, she could have presumably returned the tea to Amazon or donated it or something. (I guess the flowers are a bit more difficult in that sense.) But the main thing is that she didn't say anything earlier on. She could have simply said "I appreciate the thought behind the gift, but I cannot ethically accept them." And also said she hoped you were doing well, something like that.

I'm guessing it's also jarring for you to hear that side of her from the voice mail, if she is normally very caring. Her going off on you reminds me a bit of the time that my ex-marriage counselor went off on me in a phone call. Where he called and said, "I only have 2 minutes, and I'm going to do all the talking" (we talked longer than that). But I saw this completely different side to him--opposite of the caring, accepting person I was used to. And it was extremely painful.

I completely understand your wanting to terminate, for various reasons. I hope you will be able to see her one last time so that you have some sort of better closure than the voicemail and email.