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Jun 14, 2022, 10:05 AM
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Member Since: May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 76,655
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *Beth*
Oh, Lord, I am so exhausted, I wish I could just go to sleep, but David is coming over to take a shower...and he's late, as always. I'm always early, he's always late. What are ya gonna do.
I decided to go to the appointment with Dr. B. For one thing, I appreciated that he bothered to call and find out how I am/why I cancelled. He does 90 minute sessions, so I really had an opportunity to go over everything. So much more than I could even write out here. He is an excellent therapist. Asks the right questions, gives wise answers - and while he's very warm and caring, definitely allows me my own space and encouragement to strengthen myself, not depend upon him.
His objectivity about the situation with Mary was commendable. He didn't "involve" himself in it (although I noticed a few flickers in his eyes about certain things that must have surprised him). He did not defend Mary, nor did he trash-talk her. I did not want either of those things to happen. One of the most painful parts of this is that I still care about Mary, and still feel protective of her - which is something that, in itself, needs to be explored.
Interestingly, Dr. B. is also considering the possibility that Mary's husband (or another family member) expressed discomfort about the gifts and she felt pressured. The message she left was so very much unlike her, not her nature - especially not after she expressed such appreciation for the bells I left for her (which is typical of her).
We discussed the concept of mitzvah, which I explained to Dr. B. The highest form of performing a mitzvah, to give in the spirit of God - is to give anonymously, never to gloat (or even mention) about the giving. That is an extremely powerful concept for me.
So the session was productive. He invited me to come in again on Thursday or Friday; hopefully, I'll be able to have 4 more sessions with him before he leaves the clinic.
See you tomorrow, dear ones 
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I’m glad it went well. That’s amazing that you can get in. 4 more times! Congratulations
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Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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