I talked to T last night via Zoom. It was kind of helpful. She was like, am I right that we won't be meeting on Tuesday (tonight) because we met today? I was like, well I would actually like to still keep that appointment if I could because I am still struggling. So she said that was okay. I told her how I often don't remember things from one session to the next and she said that's okay because she takes notes and she will bring up stuff that we need to talk about, so I don't need to worry! She asked me if I needed to contract but I told her I didn't want to because I was ambivalent. She was like, oh so you want an out? I was like, yeah. I was being honest with her. I don't think she was thrilled by my answer but I have told her I would always be honest with her! So we meet tonight as well.