NOT a good day today. I feel awful mentally. Not bad physically which is good. But damn. I woke up out of sorts and I just feel like I’m being crushed under the weight of my responsibilities.

Insurance has not covered any of my partial/IOP program. None. I can only guess that a) they are going to claim It was never pre authorized or b) I’ve been fired and no one has told me and therefore I have no insurance. Thing is if my job sent me a letter outlining my firing it would have been sent to my old address, because my renewal contract was sent there in august. Better than that, I already changed my address in the system like they told me to and they STILL sent it to my old address. But they also only covered maybe 25% of a dr appt for my son which is ridiculous. EVEN IF they are out of network, which they are NOT, they should have covered 75%. So now I have to call them and get them to explain to me why they are refusing to pay all these bills.

If they claim they never pre authorized that’s BS, I know for a fact the director got them to.

Anyway I’m trying to switch to RS’s insurance but apparently I need to cancel mine first. Hmph. Ridiculous again. I may not be able to until open enrollment in NOVEMBER, if I still have a job. So am I supposed to go 7 months without insurance? Is that it? How tf is this allowed?

I have all these dumb@$$ procedures coming up and now I don’t even know if they’ll be covered. I guess the ortho is gonna have to wait

The company my work uses to determine if a medical leave is real or not called and said I might have missed the appeal window. That’s funny because it wasn’t my fault that the paperwork wasn’t done on time. I WAS SICK WITH MY MEDICAL PROBLEM you jerks!!!! How am I supposed to get all this **** together when it’s all I can do to stay alive?

I’m just so frustrated and once again NO ONE can help me and I’ve got no one irl to even talk to besides RS and it’s not fair for me to keep dumping everything on him. All my one SIL does is talk about how abusive her husband is and I’m not sure how to respond anymore. Like I can only say he’s a d—- so many times. She knows, I know, there’s nothing else to say. She can’t get out, it’s not her fault but she can’t. She needs a damn therapist and it can’t be me. And my other SIL doesn’t even talk to me anymore and I don’t want to talk to them either because what’s the point? They will just cancel if we try to get together.

Ugh. I’m over all this ****ing pressure. I just want to curl up and plug my ears for awhile.