Brian,
It's nice that you don't feel the need to call T anymore between sessions. I envy your peace of mind. However, it also sounds a little bit like you didn't win so you're moving on? I may have gotten this impression because you mention that you have learned to rely on yourself/wife. That feels more like retraction than moving forward.
It's too bad that you can't allow yourself to care whether T cares.
No pun intended--but my (very limited ) experience tells me that it's in that vulnerable place (of hoping, yearning, longing) that we can find our "touchpoint." What I mean is--the place that scares us the most--is the place where we can find the seeds that will help us to grow the tallest.
Me--I know he cares, not only about me but about his other clients as well. He is a loving, caring person and he brings much more to the table than professionalism and concern.
I also do the same. I am a teacher. And I am a really good teacher. I am a professional and I have compassion and concern for my students. But you know what? I really care about them too.
Peace