Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes
Nothing wrong with exploring your options when it comes to investigating your homes worth and what you might have if you sold it and split the cost equity and what you could get. And that is without complications because if he wants to be a jerk he could end up going through the equity in legal fees.
It’s no easy task to split up after 20 years of marriage.
Not much you can do if he chooses to be a jerk on social media. There are people that are addicted to drama. He may very well be one of them.
It’s a waste of time to call a person out if they have narcissistic tendencies. They just turn things around and play the victim. That’s not diagnosing him but from what you share it sounds like he gaslights you from time to time and avoids taking responsibility for behaving badly at times.
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I’ve been thinking of the housing options. I am thankful to have equity so trying not to be overly dramatic about the situation, but it’s tough to accept having to start over, and tough to think about the drastic loss of space and privacy. I know I am trading one discomfort for another. I’m trying to be thankful and not dwell on the potential loss.
I don’t care so much if he is a jerk on social media..yes it’s embarrassing to have friends seeing it, and it’s embarrassing for our kids…but mostly I just tie it to his mental health and think it shows he is on a destructive path. If I get carried away in fear, I worry it leads to more bigotry, to misogyny, to violence? I just don’t know with him. He fixates and is super impressionable.
You’re right, he absolutely played the victim. He does that so often, yet calls me a victim, mocking me. He says I get to do or say things and he doesn’t. Like, what does that even mean?