Thanks, StressedMess

That is why I tried to give my friend a lot of grace. Even though I told her she hurt my feelings I told her that I remember that she cares about me and she loves me. At the end of my message, I reiterated how much I care about her and that I love her. I also acknowledged that it must be very difficult to know the right thing to say sometimes. I also told her how glad I was to hear from her, as I always am. So I tried to impart that even though she didn't say something helpful this time, I still want to hear from her and I desire support and comfort from her.

My friend can be very blunt and "short" with me. She also tends to be sort of like, "well you made your own bed, so lie in it" instead of trying to be comforting or something similar. It's not the first time she has hurt my feelings and it won't be the last, I'm sure. Unless she dumps me as a friend! Which I do worry about. She is always harping on me about the consequences. It's not like I don't understand the consequences. Maybe I don't deserve kindness and grace.

Having Schizoaffective and not being able to really trust one's own thoughts at times it can be disconcerting when others don't seem to trust them either. To be told, "I hope your therapist can help you see" kind of sounds like, my way of thinking is all wrong and convoluted. And it might be. But my feelings are still valid, even if they are not rational.

My T just texted me back and said I wasn't overreacting. That's nice to know. I am just really fed up over my situation over the past week and how dang hard it is to obtain proper help. I just want to curl up in bed for a week and not exist.