I struggled with close relationships since I was a kid because of my overprotective mother abuse. I thought I was doing okay these days, I opened up to ppl, especially to women and, I dated quite a bit, trying hard not to blew it and I didn't but...

I ended up realizing that all of that effort was to make girl like me so I win. It was nothing more than revenge for past rejections (I've been rejected a lot bc of my anxiety and my mom tried to convince me it is what it is).

The next step once the girl likes me is me trying to make her dislike me so I can hit back and ditch her. I see what's behing it now - a massive amount of hatred and shame.

I dunno what to do, my T did everything he could and we're done.