Some people lack certain perspectives, it’s not their fault, they are just lacking certain experiences, as we all do in one way or another..
Your friend sounds like she doesn’t understand your self harm. Some don’t understand deep addiction or even depression, it’s ok, it’s actually good, for them.
But it means they will say things about our issues that are ignorant and seemingly insensitive, when sometimes they just don’t understand and are frustrated because they are unable to help.