Quote:
Originally Posted by BigBubba
No, I'm only charming and full of energy toward girls I'm attracted to or people I need. Those folks are interesting and attractive! The problem is I "go off" once they start to like me, no matter how cool they are.
Those girls I hang around with were the type I was looking for. Still, my goal seemed to be to get them to like me and ditch them. I'm looking for a way that can break that pattern because it sucks!
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Patterns are hard to break. People naturally gravitate towards familiar no matter how unhealthy it is. I don’t know how old you are (late 20s?) but could you completely put dating on a back burner at the moment? Right now it doesn’t do you any good. You might not be ready to break the pattern. Is there something else you could focus on?
But if you want to continue trying, could you fake it until you make it? I mean try to be nice for a bit longer and see where it leads. Being nasty is easier but it sure will lead to lonely life. Good and smart women will not be falling for it. Young girls might. As women mature they have less interest in bad behaviors. Smart independent women won’t stick around BS. You’ll be alone. If you could fake being nice for long enough, might it become a second nature?
Also therapists often advice to go for a completely different type than you normally go for. That helps to break the pattern. You might be going for ditzy girls who fall for your tricks. Look for high value women. Less focus on looks and charisma. More on depth.