You have an addiction but that doesn’t make you useless it means your life is harder. Before you can even address the MI diagnosis you need to be clean and that’s a hell of a thing to tackle. I’m very hopeful that the new team you are getting can help with that.

My daughter had a great team that helped her kick meth. It wasn’t until she was off that, that she was able to find a med to help with the mood swings. She tells me that even now 13 yrs later with a good life that there’s times when the drug life calls her. It’s irrational and seductive. I have nothing but compassion for you. But I won’t lie and say it’s easy to be in your shoes.