I'm sorry you feel so distrustful of Ts. I've had a few bad ex-Ts too.

L is different. L will tell me what's going on with her if it affects me or will help me. I do not post anything personal about her on here. It's me respecting her privacy. She did share some stuff with me today about what happened on Wednesday between us. It really helped. But I'm not going to post about it.

L owns her ****. Always. She also doesn't over apologize. We talk about it as owning our own parts in "the dance". She helps me twease out who was responsible for what. And it's not about blame. Never. She always says it's about compassion and curiosity.

I think you might believe in L more if you knew all the ins and outs of our relationship. Even though this "rupture" (I do think LT's "conflict" might fit better) did hurt my trust, after working through what happened, I do trust her again. I trust her to be 100% honest with me. I trust that she's not going to leave me. T trusts her too, so that helps.

I know L has looser boundaries than many here deem appropriate. Even my dad has voiced concerns. He's also in the category of people that believe therapy should be short-term, not indefinite. But her boundaries work for me. She teaches me through example. She shows me her weaknesses and vulnerabilities. She's not the focus, but she definitely isn't a wall.

And I think even this forums will agree that I've improved with L.