My tooth is gone, it took all of ten minutes! And I was only in pain for the rest of the day, as long as I don’t chew on that side it’s no problem.

The endoscopy was terrifying, I was nearly crying in the surgery center. It really had nothing to do with the actual procedure, it was just that I had to change into a hospital gown and give up all my stuff and I felt out of control of myself, like I was back in the crisis center knowing my freedom was about to be ripped from me and sent IP. To top that off I was so worried the anesthesia was going to feel just like ECT anesthesia. It was just one huge traumatic incident. But it’s over. She said there was “nothing remarkable” but my stomach was inflamed. But I suppose that’s perfectly normal . She took biopsies, of what I have no idea but I guess I’ll find out in two weeks.

I’m still having the pain btw. I don’t even know what to do. I guess keep record and wait until she contacts me. But I don’t want to go through a bunch of scary tests.

Anyway I’m extremely irritable, likely because I quit nicotine on Friday (can’t use a vape with a pulled tooth) and it’s also a hormonal issue, and I’m just so unbelievably disgusted with certain things that are going on in the US. I’m so mad that I’m still in program and I’m going to tell my clinician enough is enough. Since CR is having his surgery next week I will no longer be available 3x a week 3hrs/day. I need to be home for my boy and available to drop everything if he needs me.