I recently was very sick for over a month. During that time, I got admitted to the hospital twice, so this was no joke. (A severe intestinal infection.) Two people that I normally have a lot of contact with let me down.

A friend of mine lives about 2 miles away. She phones me a lot, and likes to talk a lot. When I was very sick at home, she never once asked if I needed anything from the store. Just before I got sick, I had picked up stuff for her. I can't say I was shocked. She's not one to go out of her way for anyone, but always asks others for favors. When she was without a vehicle, I used to drive her to the supermarket every weekend . . . for months.

Lately, when she calls, she looks for something to argue about. On her last call, she got really out of line. She delivered an insult that was uncalled for. She accused me of committing fraud to get something I had gotten. That was totally untrue. Usually I don't take the bait because I know she likes to be provocative. This time I calmly told her off. Since then, I decided to block her phone number.

Years ago, I had decided to just accept her as she was. I knew she argued with everyone all the time. I just let stuff go by. Then she was such a poor friend when I was very sick. Then the phone arguments escalated. I just don't want to deal with her anymore.

The other disappointment was one of my sisters who lives way far away. She also used to call a lot and liked to talk for hours. While I was real sick, I heard almost nothing from her. Finally I called her. She cut the call short saying she was tired. Many a night she has kept me up late on the phone, especially if she was drinking. So I've given up trying to connect with her. I even stopped following her family on FaceBook. She has an adult daughter I felt kind of close to. Once I wired thus niece money for a fine so she wouldn't have to go to jail. This niece never even sent me a Facebook "Get Well" message, while I was real sick and in the hospital. So I'm giving up on the whole family.

My problem is I have gotten pretty depressed. Some of it, I think, is grief over feeling like I've lost these friendships. Then I tell myself that, when the chips were down, they proved to not offer much in the line of caring. Still, I feel sad. I hadn't realized they cared so little.

Last week, my neighbor called and invited me over. I thought she was wanting to ask how my recovery was going. Once I went in and sat down with her, she launched into a lengthy discourse about her health problems. It's old stuff I've heard about before. She knew I had been taken away by ambulance and never even said, "So how are *you* feeling?"

Somehow, I managed to attract into my life persons who are very self-absorbed. I don't want to be used like that - hearing from people who contact me when they feel the urge to seek out a truckload of attention, but can't reciprocate. Yet, I feel sad about giving up on them.

In the past, there were times when I had an extra good income. I was generous with money with all these individuals. They all seemed to have pressing material needs. I gave my sister thousands. I always knew you can't buy love. I'm just kind of shocked at how no one remembers enough to just be a little bit decent when I'ld like to be thought of.

I guess I'll be sad for a while and eventually . . . . . . . just get over it.

I must admit: Two other people have been very thoughtful. It's not all black.