Having such bad anxiety today. I took anxiety medication this morning. It took the edge off but it must be wearing off because it is feeling like it is coming back pretty intensely.

I asked the controller for help balancing an account. She told me she was too busy. That I needed to just go slow. And if I cannot concentrate today to look at it another day. So basically she is not going to help me. This is frustrating as she always tells me she welcomes my questions and stuff but she never actually helps me when I need it. I understand she is busy today but she didn't say, I'd be happy to look at it on Tuesday. So I know she isn't going to review it for me. Sigh. So I went to our outside accounting firm for help. They have had the problem for 2 hours now and no response yet. I have spent 4.5 hours on it and I can't find the discrepancy. The controller hates it when I go to the outside accountants for help because of course, it costs us money. But I listen to the owners who say I can go to them anytime. I did try to go to the controller first. She just wasn't interested in helping me. I am hoping that I can look at it on Tuesday and immediately "see" the problem if the accountants don't get back to me. I've checked, and rechecked, and rechecked, and rechecked my figures. I can't find the mistake. It will drive me bananas. I need to focus on something else for a while. But I think when I try to put it away I feel guilty and so I pick it back up again.