Thanks, Scarlet. It helps to know you don't think I'm overreacting. I do think much of this is a sort of Covid fatigue, like this is still affecting both my therapy and my outside life more than 2 years after it started. And it's just exhausting and frustrating. Because there are so many unknowns.

And I'm glad you understand about the "blaming his family" thing. How it's ultimately his choice. It just feels like a cop out, like "Well, my hands are tied, so I had to do this."

As mentioned before, I did get a DBT workbook a few weeks ago, but haven't had a chance to really start on it. That's a good idea about asking if he'd be willing to work on it with me. Even if he's not specifically trained in that technique, I know one of the sections is meditation, and he *is* trained in that. So if nothing else, he'd be able to help me in working through that part. And I assume he has at least some working knowledge of the other aspects, so I could talk through some of the exercises with him, if I'm having trouble doing them, show him what I wrote, etc.

Hm, and I'll be seeing his backup, R, next week while he's away, and she's trained in trauma therapy, including EMDR--not sure about DBT (though she doesn't really do that anymore and is focused on a different type of client). But this all might be something to discuss with her.