I can't blame you all for getting to those conclusion, when I read what I wrote it really looks bad. But this is too complex situation to explain in anything less that several pages and who wants to read that? I am not a crazy stalker, though I can see how it may look that way. I am not pushing or harassing him. I sent him few messages over a year period and since I know him for 25 years, I knew from his replies that he is mentally in really bad place and on the edge, so much that I fear that he could do something to himself. I know the man. He is not "usual" if I may say so. He never lies, that sounds weird, but he doesn't. He will try to avoid truth if it's unpleasant but if you ask him directly he will say it. He has a bit exaggerated attachment to his parents, but who am I to judge him? It's his choice. I don't want him as my boyfriend, I do not contact him except few careful messages, but I am worried he might hurt himself if you know what I mean. I would want to help a stranger who wants to hurt themselves let alone someone who used to be my friend. Problem is, he refuses any help and as he said before while we were still having contact, sometimes, he "just wants to die". He also said and wrote multiple times that his life is "hell". And I do believe him. He does need help, maybe not my help, but some. But he refuses it, as depressed people do.
I see I come off as a crazy stalker woman who wants her ex back, and as I am not native English, it's quite possible that I am not best in this language and what I write can be read wrongly. But in simplest term, I am afraid that man who used to be my friend will hurt himself, badly and I don't know what to do as he refuses any contact with me. That is all. Hope I wrote this better.
PS it's not my place to state which diseases those are, but these two people are over 80 and have horrible physical deformities due to old age, and I rather not get into details but they do need round the clock care. Also, I don't think I need to explain how he survives moneywise, it doesn't matter here. Obviously, they barely get by.