ditto, MissCharlotte, what Jello said. My post was meant to say that I expect and respect the diversity of responses. I'm sorry my post made you sigh.
To answer the question, I know my T cares because he has told me and also by his actions. I like that he has told me without my having to ask. It means a lot to me since I have spent way too many years married to a man who was emotionally incapable and would never volunteer such information. So to have a man, even though he is my T, say without prompting that he cares is very powerful. It helps, at least a little bit, restore my faith in men.
I really like how he makes me tea and shares food with me.