T didn't tell me she was going for a second week's holiday shortly after the first one. I only found out as she mentioned it in connection with something else right at the end of yesterday's session.

I'm devastated, not just that she's going away twice within a few days but that it didn't occur to her that she hadn't mentioned it. It's kind of a big thing.

I have a lot going on in my life - awful stuff - and that is really hard to deal with.

She told me to text her about it (she knew I was upset) and I did but no reply.

This morning I asked if I could see her for an extra session or a call sometime over the next few days. She replied saying she was totally booked up. She has never said no to a call. She nearly always fits me in for a session.

I'm absolutely distraught. I told her to forget it and she responded that she couldn't not show up or cancel everything. She's not normally defensive.

We have a close relationship and I don't know what to do. The overriding feeling is hurt that she somehow didn't realise she hadn't said she was having not one holiday but two. There's nothing unusual about the second holiday, she's just going with other members of her family, so it's not something she'd rather not think about or anything like that.

I made clear I was in despair and couldn't sit with this over the next week. I never say that. And yet she said no even to a short call.

I feel broken.