Quote:
Originally Posted by SlumberKitty
Thank you Quietmind 2, as always, I value your input!
First off: the thing with the coworker: I think this goes deeper than I had originally thought/understood when I bought her the gift card. My only thoughts I had when I was buying for her was that she helped me out and I took time away from her schedule and wanted to know that she was appreciated.
A friend of mine sort of challenged me to go deeper with it so I have been trying to analyze it a bit more. I think if this was a coworker that I got along with well, I might not have gotten the gift card. A verbal thank you or a thank you email might have sufficed. But I have also given gift cards to coworkers that I get along well with so I'm not sure that I was trying to "make up" for not getting along well with her. I'm not sure. I frequently buy my coworkers a coffee or lunch or something. (I mean, not all of them, but the ones I come into regular contact with). But they also reciprocate, so it's okay. This coworker works in NY and I work in CA so we don't really have a reciprocal relationship like that but it felt right in my heart at the time that I gave her the gift card. Only later when a friend questioned me about it, did I think, oh did I do something wrong? BTW, I still don't have an answer to that.
Secondly, about charity and donations and so forth. Yeah, I spend a lot of money on charity and donations and stuff like that and I am not saving enough for myself. I have been contemplating whether I should step back some from some of my commitments to charity and what that says about me as a person. It is coming in direct odds with my religious beliefs which is hard for me because it's a core part of who I am and how I identify with the world around me. On the other hand, I can see that I am suffering in some areas because I'm giving a significant portion of my income away. It's something I am currently wrestling with and I haven't come up with a good answer.
Thank you for your care and concern for me. I appreciate it!  |
Hugs! I'm glad about the co-workers being reciprocal.
As for donations and charity, I can definitely see where you're coming from, due to how giving is a really important value for you. Especially when religious beliefs reinforce your generous spirit.
You are a kind and giving person, and it's not tied to the amount you donate/gift. You offer plenty of caring here, and that's also valuable.
My parents come from a denomination where 10% is the minimum too and they have high income so it wasn't a hardship for them.
However there's some churches in my region who take it to an extreme who preach that the more you give financially even if it cuts deeply into your needs, the more you'll be blessed: it harms a lot of low income people, while the pastors are multimillionaires living extremely luxurious lives.
Not saying your church is like that or most churches, and I'm not trying to pressure you into doing anything you don't want to do.
What I wrote was sparked by my own process in my therapy and I noticed the pattern of kindness you have.