Yaowen

You don't know how much I appreciate your perspective. I want to thank you for this considered and practical reply, which, I can assure you, I'll follow-up on as soon as I get the chance.

Honestly, I have no way of knowing who you really are, but please just know that, for this individual, your gentle acknowledgement is a much-needed support in a time of acute personal upheaval.

The notion of thoughts holding power over us resonated with me. It may be related to the idea of an adversary's words hurting us. In that way we have also allowed them some unwarranted power. Power which may be addressed in a similar way to the one you suggest.

Again, thank you.

Edit: I'll just add, for any fellow separatees out there, that one way I've tried to rationalise things is to consider the situation from her perspective: I know she is also hurting - the pain may originate in a different place to mine, but it is pain nonetheless. I also know she'll be trying to deal with the separation in ways that I do not - Whether she's b1tch1ng to friends, sobbing with her hairdresser or whatever, that's how she is working through this situation. From time to time her feelings are going to manifest as resentment or anger towards me. I have to accept this, too, as a natural part of the grieving/healing process. She has as much right to those emotions as anyone else.