You are right in that you are the one who has to change and/or do the work. It does not mean you have to do it alone. I believe change is possible with support - meaning, your current T however much he has helped may no longer be the best support *now* for what you need.

In that sense, you are not hopeless. You 'just' haven't found the best source of support to help you right now. That is a major distinction to make.

It also doesn't have to be therapy. It can be other peer or support groups. You can try activities that involve your body, movement, creative expression, sports, dance etc. Anything that helps you feel connected (to anything) in the moment and sink into that - this is another form of support. Other non-human forms of support may be pets: do you have one? can you volunteer at a shelter otherwise? or pet-sit?