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Jul 16, 2022, 06:16 PM
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Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MuddyBoots
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I'm starting to feel like most of my mental health stuff is caused by trauma rather than biological origins. I hid it forever under a bubbly mask and then it turned angry and then *I* turned to anything to numb that anger. And then I went seeking out more trauma because that's what I had learned I deserved.
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Yep. I tend to agree with your insight about yourself, and I am becoming more & more sure that my situation is the same - at least to a substantial degree. I haven't had addiction or SH issues myself, but I've sure had many a friend who did. My behaviors were more relationship-oriented and sexual stuff.
I had a dear friend, we used to roller skate together in a city, downtown, mostly at night. This was only about 12 years ago. She lived across the street from this incredible landmark dive bar & we'd skate in the parking lot behind the bar. Her apartment was a total dump, but she had fixed it up to be something special. However, it was a
To shorten a long story...my friend had a serious habit. For several years. She was in very bad shape. Then one day, just one day, she said Enough. She dumped the boyfriend, got hooked up with a clinic and various social services. She worked sooo hard to stay clean. After awhile she enrolled in university as a fine arts major, spent 4 years there, graduated, and is now a professional textile artist. She's in her late 30's and has a real life.
And I know so many, too many, others who have struggled with addiction. A couple didn't make it. The rest did. They did get clean, stayed clean, and created lives for themselves. I don't think a single one of them could envision a "normal" life while in the middle of fighting addiction. But there you go. It happens.
Anyway, just some thoughts.
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