Quote:
Originally Posted by NP_Complete
I want to know how he feels about me now and if he's had any sort of growth since then. Does he still think the way he was treating me was okay? Does he think it was no big deal to casually threaten to kill me? He did all this crap and I still want to see him. I'm so messed up. I doubt anyone in my life, other than P, even knows that it's the anniversary. I'm feeling kind of sui, but not in an emotional way.
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It IS self care. Sending you lots of care. I understand those questions, I've similar ones about my abusers. Sometimes I want to see them too.
I can describe my experiences of confronting my parents and abusive brother, and their responses but I don't know if that would be helpful.
You're not "messed up", you are traumatised.