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Hallie-do you have OCD? I'm no expert but from what I know of it you sound like you have a lot of symptoms.
Nammu- hope the edibles help.... start small!!!
__________________
"I don't know what I'm looking for."
"Why not?"
"Because...because...I think it might be because if I knew I wouldn't be able to look for them."
"What, are you crazy?"
"It's a possibility I haven't ruled out yet,"
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