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MeAndkids
New Member
 
Member Since Jul 2022
Location: Bellingham, WA
Posts: 1
1
Default Jul 22, 2022 at 03:05 PM
 
New here.
My husband and I have been together for 15 years. Married for 10 years. We had 5 children together, 2 of which passed away during infancy. We have never really fought. More or less we would disagree on something and just agree to disagree. We have had many struggles., mainly financially after so many downs... the loss of our 2 children, loss of my job, having three more children (a set of twins included) he had a work related injury causing him to lose his job. Go unemployed for years ans lived off half his wages thru labor and industries. He finally landed a good job, but first year in he was in an accident and broke his back. Then I had the twins ans was taking care of house kids and him. Then he recovered returned to work and went into afib three times in one year also on short term disability during all that. Covid comes and he remained working although with all our life events were were drowning I. Debt. I could find a job due to both covid and the lack of work history over 12 years time. And although he asked me to help him financially I tried and tried and just haven't came up with a job yet. We were still ok relationship wise but broke. We opted to file for ch. 13 bankruptcy so we could get out of debt and keep out car and house. This was 6 months ago. He feels like he makes good money but we aren't getting anywhere, knowing full well that the bankruptcy was going to prevent us from. Immediately moving or anything. So we were ok. No fighting everything was good intimately and then one day 2 weeks ago he woke up in a different mood. I recognized it immediately and asked him what was wrong. He said he didn't know. Then he proceeds to me tell me he loves me but isn't in love with me. I know he was mad over getting paid and having nothibg left over. I would be mad too. But we didn't fight. He just came out and said he wanted a dicorce. I asked him to just think about it and he said he had and then I showed him a budget plan that would help us both financially. He didn't want to hear it. He wanted to discuss divorce and what I want from it. I told him I didn't want a dicorce I told him I will find a job and I told him we can do this together and be happier. He then said he needed time. Only then to come the next day bringing up divorce and wanting me to give him a set amount of money I want every month
. I told him I couldn't even think rationally as my emotions were all over the place. He mentioned waiting on dicorce til our bankruptcy explanation ends (approximately 2 and 1/2 years from now. We still have small talk and get along well until our separation comes up. He lives in a camper at his work. He usually messages each of kids "loveyou" at night but it's been 2 days and none of have heard from him. He did tell me he was going away this weekend and he needs time. I'm trying desperately to give him his time. I'm just having a hard time understand how this is so easy for Jim. Is he even thinking about me. He he misses me. I try to think it's not possible for him to not miss me, we spent the last 15 years not going a day without speaking. How can he not feel something about that.
Am I hopeful wishing when I sit here thinking he might come back to me? Has anyone else gone thru something similar and had their spouse come back?
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