Ugh, I was supposed to meet with Dr. T in person today (schedule is weird because he's off Friday), and he texted a bit ago saying he had to change to virtual. We just had the discussion Friday about how I was concerned about his health and things due to his various days off, having to do virtual a few days next week, etc. I hope he at least gives some sort of reason for it (I mean, if it's like his car won't start, just tell me!) If he doesn't, well, it could be a good jumping-off point for a discussion I had with R while he was out, how for me, going back to childhood, secrets = bad. In other words, if someone is being secretive about a thing, it's presumably a bad thing (which more recently reinforced by the stuff with ex-MC's wife).

I do appreciate that he was compassionate in the wording of his text to me: "[Lonesome] - I apologize for the late change but I will not be able to make it into the office this morning and will need to see you over zoom. Sorry for that, I know the change is hard for you, particularly at the last minute."

But it kinda sucks because I went to a concert last night that I really enjoyed, so I was feeling happy about that. So I kind of wanted to talk about what some of that brought up in me, feeling particularly connected to the crowd there, felt very "in the moment" like we'd been talking about, stuff with a couple songs maybe, etc. But now I feel like I'm just going to sign into Zoom and start crying. I guess I can still choose to talk about that (not sure if I can control the crying though).