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Originally Posted by ElectricManatee
Oh, I'm sorry, LT. I sincerely despise those last-minute messages from my therapist. It's never "Just wanted to let you know I'm looking forward to a great session!"
That's a really excellent insight from R! I think it's more likely that Dr. T is disrupting his schedule for something good (kitchen remodel or finishing his basement, for example), but the secretive nature is throwing your imagination into overdrive. It would be helpful for you specifically if he could find way to tell you the truth that still feels comfortably boundaried for him. (Occasionally my T will delivery a cryptic statement that she has clearly crafted ahead of time, like, "Everybody is fine, but I need to go out of state to deal with a family issue," or whatever.)
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Thanks, EM. And good point that it's not like he'd text to say, "Looking forward to seeing you!" So as soon as I saw a text from him, it was like, "oh, no." It's better than canceling entirely, but I thought maybe he was just going to ask for a time change or something.
Assuming he doesn't tell me right off (I mean, maybe he's been exposed to Covid but didn't want to text it, say), I might ask if he could give me some sense that fits within his boundaries. Even just whether it's a one-off vs. recurring thing. Or about him or someone else, say. Or person vs. thing (like a car issue, though I don't know why he'd feel that's a boundary).
I think the example of how your T explained it is good. Not going into details, but reassuring you that all is fine. Maybe if I gave him that example, it would help him come up with something? (I mean...assuming it's not a case where everything *isn't* fine....But I'd think if it was that bad, he'd have just cancelled entirely.)