You did it for a reason - A reason we here won't judge.. And it caused even more trauma!.. The memory... Dissociating away from it, uncontrollably.

There will be massive progress in mental health happening in 5-10 years. I can't even imagine if I'll be alive in 1-2 years..

To heal, BB. That is the plan.

I drank two large bottles (While on high dose Prozac - Should have caused serotonin syndrome and killed me) - I stared into the abyss, "Hey... I know the meaning of the universe - But no one will believe me..". It was a horrible time.. I was 17 - (Obviously didn't help with prodromal schizophrenia).

I was worse in terms of stupidity.. I went all in on stuff like that. I was chasing a high in an absolutely horrible existence - But it helped.. I could eventually help out the world with a field of profession - But I'm no genius like Alexander Shulgin, Rick Doblin etc..

There's no brain damage - It just needs to be reset. The tools are coming. Don't ever give up. I believe in you..

I was watching "How to Change Your Mind" (Michael Pollen) on Netflix (About LSD, psilocybin, MDMA etc) with my mom.. My dad was watching too.

The world changes, like a rhythmic, spiritual pattern of good and evil.. You have great fears.. And if I had magic powers, I'd eliminate them. Love is all we need.

With time.. Things will definitely get better. We just have to increase our quality of life for the time being - Even forget when not feeling any pain, and live for moments - Or good amounts of time..