Quote:
Originally Posted by Yaowen
I can TOTALLY relate to what you write about although my situation is not identical to yours. Things like this have happened to me and even this morning! It does sting and it can leave a stain on one's memory too.
Something that helps me [although it may not help you] is the idea of projection. This is the idea, you probably already know, that when people feel bad about something in themselves or hate something about themselves, they try to get relief from the pain by projecting it onto someone else, by saying something mean or hateful to someone else.
I wonder if what the person you call "J" said to you reveals more about him or her than you. I wonder if "J" deep down thinks about herself or himself in the negative way she spoke to you. And I really suspect that "J" feels like an imposter deep down.
Today someone said something quite mean to me. After the initial shock and emotional after effects I realized: "This person is talking about himself not me.
So do you think that maybe that is something similar to what happened to you or am I completely off base? Perhaps I am overly reading my experiences into yours. In any case, I hope many people see your post today and respond with something helpful!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bizi
I bet that stings! get into your local theater acting guild
there is a need for local plays and you would be perfect
for this venue.
bizi
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Thanks for that guys.
I always wanted to keep it up. Not necessarily at a professional level, but just to do something I enjoy. Having that woman sap all of the joy I got out of it makes me angry even today!
However, my introspection runs a bit deeper than that.
J was wrong, but she was so confidently wrong that I doubted myself and the fact that I hesitated, even for an instant, made her confident wrongness confident rightness and there was nothing to dissuade her from her "correct" reasoning.
It's not just J. I've had bosses, professors, even family members espouse confident wrongness that was proven "right" by their position of relative power. I can't get anywhere in life when the first impressions of others are the only right, true and unchanging position from now into perpetuity. I can't get anywhere in life if I feel I have to constantly dissuade people from their confident wrongness.
I can't do it alone, but it seems I can't do it with people either.
