(((((((((Silversparrow)))))))))))

You can do this. Can you make a list of reasons *not* to cut? I know it's hard... but it might help. Or maybe make a list of things that make you happy (that are positive) and then try to do at least one or two of them?

I'm sorry you had a freakout. You are not a loser, and it is normal to have anxiety involving trips and planning/thinking about the "worst case scenario" but chances are... nothing bad is going to happen.

You are not failing, you are struggling. That's okay.