Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel
LT,
From your Dear T post: I think it is growth. L says new things, even things we perceive as "negative", is growth. For example: the first time I admitted I was angry with her. Or now we joke (but it's serious/honest) if I slammed a door or canceled a session, that would be growth too.
Embracing "negatives" is growth. A lot of us try so hard to be "good", but the truth is, we're not ALL good. We have anger and jealousy, etc. And we all have different parts of us. It's part of being human. So you feeling comfortable with irritated or frustrated parts of you is a good thing. At least imo.
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Thanks, Scarlet, that helps to hear how L considers it growth. Both in expressing it and feeling comfortable with it inside you (which is a big part of what I struggle with--feeling anger, for example, and not just automatically turning it inward).
I feel like if it was something I was afraid to do before (even just temporarily), and now I'm doing that, it could be a positive thing. I mean, if I were just constantly berating him for his shortcomings as a T or a person, that wouldn't be positive! But to speak up about something I want/need or something that disappoints me, upsets me, or otherwise bothers me, as long as I do so in a generally respectful manner, I do think that's generally positive. Honestly, if I were to curse him out, I think that would be a positive development of sorts, too! He might think otherwise though....