You can get an idea of your homes current value and projects that may increase value be talking to a realtor. Explain your situation, tell them you aren't ready to sell, you're trying to understand the current market and options, etc.

A written appraisal may be needed anyway. Laws vary, but it's likely a declaration of assets and liabilities will be needed and a home appraisal is a solid start at gathering that info. In my opinion, you don't have anything to lose by asking questions and getting a professional perspective.

I hope whatever choices you make, you put yourself first. It's important to teach your daughter how to do that for herself. You are her best example for healthier behaviors.