I'm with AzulOscure on that one. Paranoia can be a sign of the onset of schizophrenia, for instance. If you could get her to see a psychiatrist, that might be worth it. Or go see one yourself, perhaps they have some tips for you.

Don't look down on her though. She has a right to her paranoia, even if it messes with both her own, and your and your son's life. I have a friend who left the country with her husband and kids, to live in a country she doesn't speak the language of, because there they can homeschool the kids. They don't want to wear masks, or get vaccinated. The have a fountain in tha garden and a solar system installed to be independent. We talked about her going to therapy (not because of her believes, but because of her abusive childhood), but she fears they will take the kids away. I'm not sure that fear is unreasonable. And I love her, she has every right to think and decide as she does. We talk about all of it. I do agree with some things, also. I am vaccinated, but I don't agree the state has a right to force people to get vaccinated, for instance.

My point is if you are embaraced because of her, that is really your issue, not hers. But it would be good regardless to ensure she is just changing, not heading into serious mental health issues. If you don't want to stay, it is of course your right to leave, but it is not your right to demand she stay the person you married 20 years ago. And you can share custody, of course