Gosh sqrl, thank you for that reply. I must confess, after submitting that last post I felt quite....exposed. I never intended to reveal quite that much about myself or my life. I lay in bed last night with the mantra, "oh dear God, what have I done????" But the surprise of that was, I slept like the dead. I had purged what I was always fighting so hard to hold back in so many of my earlier posts. I guess now, in a sense, I feel free. Reading my post this morning I was a little horrified at how much I had actually left unsaid that would have glued it all together a bit more, but I think I probably would've ended up crashing the site had I said all that I could've said, lol. The whole thing came out a bit more stoic than I would've liked, but I think my intent at the time was just to state the facts.

Anyway, sqrl, yes, you are right. Because of ppl like you, cheshire, empty and others here, my grip IS a little bit stronger. The isolation that I tend to feel in my 3d world is kept more at bay by the connections I've made here. It is so cathartic and therapeutic to know that others are in the same boat with you, even helping to bail when the ship starts sinking.

As you know sqrl from our PM's, I watched anonymously from the sidelines for many months before making myself "visible" here. I needed to know that I had a place here...something to offer. I never expected to receive so much. I mean really, who of you in coming here thought that faceless and for the most part, nameless, ppl could come to mean so very much to you. Touching the deepest places of your heart and soul. My heart swells at the mere thought of it all. I'll sometimes be going about daily life at the grocery store or the bank or sitting with a friend....and I find myself wishing I was here. I cannot lie, it's mostly for a select few...but I care about sooo many of you.

I am richer for having come here and allowing myself to be open to all of you. Thank you, meager as that it is, is all I can think to say. TgrsPurr.