Also nearing 40 and coming to terms with the no children thing. But where there is loss, there is also gain. I get to do things that mother's with children can't, for example. 40 is a funny age I think, that mid life 'crisis' age (though it happened to me as I hit 30 too!)

But the real reason I hopped on to comment was because of what triggered me to really make some changes to my life. To realise that I COULD make changes to my life. A guy at work told me a story. He is a lovely guy, mid 50s with a lovely wife, a beautiful little home and some interesting hobbies. His life isn't perfect though, as none of ours are. He struggles with his weight and his mental health, but you don't get to see that too often. Like most of us, he shows a different face to different people.

But he told me a story one day which had a huge impact on me. He told me a story of when he was 34 and was dating a girl. They were renting somewhere because he couldn't afford to buy. They split up and he (being the decent guy that he is) told her to take what she needed from the flat. He said he would be ok, but wanted her to have what she needed. He went away for work and when he came back he found she had emptied the flat of everything. Everything except the phone book. She had taken it all.

Here was a guy, not much younger than I was at the time, who had next to nothing, and yet twenty years later his life was completely different. Twenty years is a long time! Changes can be made in a blink of an eye in comparison.

Not long after this, I left my husband. It took over 2 years from me saying I was done to us selling the house and going our separate ways. In the moment it felt like forever, but in comparison to the rest of my life, it is nothing. I am now in a happy relationship with someone who treats me right. I have friends. I have hobbies. I have even started my own business. Things I never could have dreamt of 5 years ago.

I don't know. I just wanted to tell you the same story he told me, because it's easy to let time, and life, pass us by, thinking that we cannot change, that we cannot life the happy life we see everyone else living. But there are two things to remember. What we see as 'the perfect lives' are often not that great at all, we just don't get to see their difficulties. And we CAN make those small changes which can often snowball and lead to bigger, more unimaginable changes for the better in our own lives...you just have to find a way, and that way will be different for all of us.