(((((Soli))))) Those are some hard times you've had with T recently. I wanted to comment on your new siggy, as that is what is really capturing my attention in your posts.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Suffocate, be in extreme emotional pain, and realize there's nothing you can do about it. You have no power. You will have access to me as I see fit. Your neediness is disgusting. Trust me to decide what you need.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Soliaree, your T said this to you? Those words scare me. I think if someone spoke those words to me, I would leave and never look back. Those words are not empowering in the least and sound like they come from someone who adores power. I believe we have all sorts of power over our lives and I think most therapists would promote this view. Why would your T say to you "you have no power"? How is that therapeutic? Those words make it sound as if he is trying to beat you down.

Your T really said, "your neediness is disgusting?" Again, how is this therapeutic? It is major countertransference and an inappropriate disclosure, IMO.

And the part I disliked the most was "Trust me to decide what you need." How condescending and infantilizing. A really important thing my therapist said to me in one of our first sessions was "only you know what you need to heal." I realized that is so true. I need to look inside and I will discover what I need. I can share this with T and he will help me with what I find, but he certainly can't know what I need to heal. He's not a mindreader or God. It's a partnership, not an outsider saying "I know your needs" and not letting you speak up for yourself. To be frank, Soliaree, that last statement of your T's disgusts me.